A) Mishloach Manot
*Halacha
Every man or woman is obligated to give two readily-consumable food
items to one person. When a husband gives, then technically, his wife can be
considered exempt from his giving. However, if she wishes to give her own
mishloach manot, then she has fulfilled a mitzvah. Additionally, each child (male
or female) over the age of bar and bat mitzvah is individually obligated
to give and is not exempt due to the father's giving. Parents must give their
over-bar/bat mitzvah-age kids adequate resources (either food items or money)
to fulfill the mitzvah of mishloach manot properly.
Do you hear that? That is the sound of a million Jewish moms
fainting.
*Tips:
-Right off the bat I want to point out that at diff points of your
life this mitzvah will be performed differently. When you are a mommy, you will
be throwing potato chips and chocolate wafers into colourful bags. Other years
you will find the energy to bake and assemble more intricate mishloachei manot.
It's all good. Do not judge yourself or compare yourself to anybody else. And
if you are blessed with daughters, when they are older they will have plenty of
time to complain that you are embarrassing them with the mishloachei manot you
selected. Until that point, enjoy giving simple ones and invest your energy
elsewhere.
-Mishloach manot as X-treme competitive sport and/or an exercise in
social guilt can be draining financially and energetically. Pay attention to
whom you are giving to and why. Worry less about offending the Goldsteins and
the Silvermans and pay attention to the person who might not be on the entire neighbourhood's
list and who will really notice receiving a mishloach manot.
-I feel like often while families are busy fulfilling the mitzvah
of mishloach manot, they end up inadvertently transgressing baal tashchit
(wasting things like food and/or money). 'Nice' and 'expensive' do not have to
be synonymous. Some of my most appreciated mishloach manot were inexpensive.
Like the faux-sushi salad I gave last year (see picture below). I let the kids each
choose 2-3 types of junk food their friends like and they include that in their
mishloachei manot. Balance.
B) Matanot L'Evyonim
*Halacha
Everyone is obligated to give charity to two different people in
need. The charity needs to be given the day of Purim (so giving it say, Purim
night after the night megila reading doesn't count). However a person may
appoint someone to give on his behalf, assuming that it gets distributed in the
day time of Purim.
*Tip:
-From Rabbi Weiner: Mishloach manot can be a face-saving way
to perform matanot le'evyonim. If you know someone struggling financially but
refuses to ask for help/take tzedaka, a seuda-friendly mishloach manot is a
great way to preserve a fellow yid's dignity and fulfill matanot le'evyonim.
May
our unity and loving-kindness once again bring about Redemption, just as it did
2500 years ago!! Le'chaim ve'livrocha!!
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